"EARTH SUCKS"

What on Earth is wrong with me? Astronomy is my only comfort.
It's becoming clear there ain't much life down here...
Chain stores and holy wars, total bores—somebody gag me
I've had my fill of food and boys who call me "dude"
Is this all? Eternity inside a mall?
Was I created to be relegated to a world so freaking small?
I'd rather hit the planetarium than watch some dumb reality program.
My peers can have their beers, I'll be scouting the stratosphere.
But gravity is always grounding me.
I would pay a zillion bucks just to ditch all of these schmucks...

Earth sucks! Humans suck! Houston sucks! Texas sucks! Earth sucks!

Earth boys are what you want...if you want angst. Can't I do better?
Fact is there's no one fun revolving 'round the Sun.
Why is it so far out to dream about superior life forms?
They say love arrives in every shape and size...
All I ask from a universe so deep and vast:
Contact with a loving race, and can you make him carbon-based?
But I can't flee this suburban galaxy.
I'm gonna set myself on self-destruct if I don't improve my luck...

Earth sucks! School sucks! Tests suck! Jobs suck! Earth sucks! Money sucks!
Earth sucks! Malls suck! Clothes suck! Phones suck! Earth sucks! Boys suck!
Earth sucks! Cars suck! T.V. sucks! Movies suck! Earth sucks! Love sucks!
Earth sucks! Parents suck! Dads suck! Moms suck! Earth sucks! Death sucks!
Earth sucks! The past sucked! The present sucks! The future will suck!
Earth sucks! Everything sucks!